Ok, I’ve left this subject alone for a week, but I’m ready to go back at it. This conversation is really happening out there in the world, so we need to discuss it, and speak up! If you didn’t read the original article, you can read my post here. Here's the next excerpt from the townhall.com article:

Here is a story that illuminates why kids languish in foster care. At a recent meeting of foster parents, the president of the foster parents’ association introduced the evening’s speaker. "This is Joe. He is one... more

So, Anna is sick today. She woke up in the middle of the night and spent most of the night vomiting. At one point she turned to me and asked "Mommy, why did I do that?" It's really hard to be little and trying to understand things around you or even the way your body works. I told her she was sick and that Mommy would stay with her. She slept the rest of the night in my bed, and we changed sheets several times during the night - I think at least five - but all she wanted was for me to stay with her.

I am her real mom. I may not have given birth to her. I may not have carried her inside me for nine months. I may not look like her. I may have no biological connection to her. I may have... more

The number of folks on the internet grows daily. I am not aware of any exact numbers of how many triad members searching are using the internet as an aid in their search. Since the numbers grow every day, I thought it would be good to address searching on the internet.

Search engines are a wonderful asset. You can enter the name you are searching for into a search engine in homes of finding he person listed on some website. If you put the name in quotation marks will aid you by finding the exact name you are searching for. In some cases if you enter a phone number... more

Ok, I have to admit that I love movies. I come from a long line of movie buffs, and I love them! I like comedies, dramas, musicals, action films, foreign films…not so much horror…and I especially love old movies. One of my all-time favorites is “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner”, starring Katharine Hepburn, Spencer Tracy and Sydney Poitier. If you do not know the film, it was made in 1967, and is about a white couple (Hepburn and Tracy) and how they handle it when their daughter comes home with a black fiancé (Poitier). The parents believe themselves to be open-minded and certainly... more

Some adoption agencies are now offering “post-adoption services”. In some cases, this includes searches.

Here are a few facts to remember about agency searches:

 Depending on state law, searches may only be offered on the behalf of the adoptee. However, some states and/or agencies will provide searches for birth or adoptive parents, siblings and/or other birth relatives.

 All the agencies that I have found that offer searches charge a fee for this service. Some may provide special hardship waivers, however, I imagine that waiving the... more

If International Adoption is part of your world ... heck, any adoption, or if there are kids involved just about anywhere you are ... here's a site you should check out: The Center for Adoption Medicine.

From pre-adoption consultation, to a Glossary of Russian Medical Terms, how to take FAS photos and more, more, more, The Center for Adoption Medicine is rich with material and generous in sharing knowledge.

For those adopting toddlers and concerned about Autism,... more

Have you ever heard the phrase “the carrot and the stick”? The image is of an animal tempted to forward motion by a carrot dangling in front of its nose, with a stick to swat the animal forward in case the carrot isn’t convincing enough. The carrot is the reward, the stick is the punishment.

Some people have called open adoption a “carrot.” Are they right? Is open adoption merely an incentive to place, for those who would not otherwise have done so? The answer is no, that's not the intention, but it can work out that way.

If a pregnant woman doesn’t... more

Yesterday I wrote about how Little J has behavioral problems. I was at a low point when I wrote it - frustrated with the weekend and really worried about what to do with my little guy.

I got some wonderful feedback and support. Thank you all so much! My husband and I have also decided to take Jamie to a behavioral clinic to start to find some answers. He's already been evaluated for Sensory Integration Dysfunction, and we're addressing that, but a lot of his more recent behaviors don't seem connected to that,... more

How do you know if you have explanation fatigue? Do you answer adoption questions in a monotone? Do you feel like a telephone recording – press 1 if you want to know why we chose Korea, press 2 if you want to know how long the process is...? Do you sometimes contemplate throwing the asker out the nearest window? That would be explanation fatigue.

It doesn’t matter what stage in the adoption process you are in – the just decided stage, the paperwork stage, the waiting stage, the parenting stage. The questions come poring in. When you decide to adopt from Korea, your... more

Ok...I'm stuck on this Holland theme. Mostly because it occurred to me how "stuck" parents of special kids feel. It is much like that Eagles song, Hotel California:

You can check out anytime you like...but you can never leave.

And never means NEVER. --For the parents whose children aren't sleeping all night, never means that they never get the full night's sleep and adequate rest. --For the parents who can not find safe reliable respite care, never means never taking a vacation or even going on a date without the special... more