I just started reading this newish anthology about having babies called Maybe, Baby, written by people who write for Salon.com.

I'm enjoying it so far. I've read one and a half essays, and not from the beginning, either. I've skipped past all the first sections of articles about indecision right to the heart of the matter: to the people who went ahead and did it. They were feeling maybe-ish, but then they took the leap to the state of babyhood.

I am jealous. I am jealous of them and I'm jealous of Erin,... more

The very last place that felt like "foreign soil" to me was the first place we went when our plane landed in the U.S. when we came home with Little J. It was the Immigration and Naturalization Service at JFK airport in New York.

Yes, we were in New York. The guards and facilitators in Customs made that very clear, both with their accents and their attitudes, but it was the last hurdle we needed to get through to get our baby home - to be free. Once we were passed through the desks at the INS we could go anywhere or do anything, including catching our flight home to Raleigh. Or not.... more

The daycare called yesterday. With caller-id, I know who they are before I pick up. I always cringe a little before I pick it up. It could be simple. It could be complicated.

Sometimes when they call, he’s bumped his head or gotten a scrape on the playground. These are simple calls. In fact, generally I don’t want to know about them unless they’re going to tell me he’s being rushed to the emergency room. He’s two and a half and a boy…he’s going to get bumps and scrapes. I understand liabilities so I don’t complain when they call – usually I just sigh with relief... more

Well it is about that time of year when the good fruits and veggies will hit the market.

All sorts of grapes, apples, bananas and peaches. Along with Onion, cucumber, lettuce and tomatoes. Everything you could ask for fresh and at your finger tips.

Strawberries are already in season and every where you look you can find strawberry pie or shortcake on the menu.

All the trimmings for a good pot roast and bbq are at your finger tips. Good salads for every meal. A perfect time to find all the good nutrition your body... more

Beth had swimming practice tonight, and she has been after me to go watch her. The coaches prefer the parents stay away, so I don’t make an appearance too often. The progress she has made is incredible. She looks so at home in the water. And she was flying! She made it look effortless. If I had to get from Point A to Point B in the water to keep from drowning, I would struggle. I hated swimming lessons!

While she was swimming I visited with a gentleman who was there with his grandson. For a change, I was not the one who started the conversation! He wanted to talk and so we did. Turns out... more

I’m a little agitated today. Not only did I forget to post today (until now), but someone parked in front of my mailbox today and the mail wasn’t delivered. Grrr. I was expecting pictures that I ordered today.

Okay, so beyond my frustration, I’ve been thinking about stories again today. In particular, I’ve been thinking about “when you were born” stories. My friend is going to have her baby tomorrow. I’m very excited. It’s her third child. She has a girl and a little boy already... I made sure I was on her calling list and she promised me that I am.

I... more

The Free Trade Agreement that is about to take effect with Central America is being met both with open arms and raised fists and not much in between. The selling points of the FTA (TLC by its Spanish abbreviation) are that it will open the market of Guatemalan products to the USA, create jobs, and enable modernization of society and economy. However, many who are in opposition believe that the opposite effect will occur. They believe the already widening gap between the rich and the impoverished will become a chasm, unable to be crossed.

The Prensa Latina speaks of upcoming protests planned... more

Deciding to adopt Belane was not an easy process. For one, we already had nine kids, which is more than enough for most people, and truth be told, I am (probably too) sensitive and worry a lot about what other people think about me and my family. Add to that the fact that Belane is HIV+ and it was a huge decision. I've decided to share an edited version of my journal with you, so you can really see how it all came to be.

Part One...

I first came to hear about AHOPE on the Yahoo EthiopiaAdopt email list. A woman named Susan sent a post to the list in early January, asking if anyone who was traveling to Ethiopia soon would be willing to visit AHOPE, an orphanage for HIV+ children,... more

Other than acknowledging how similar Nancy’s thoughts and feelings are to her own, Amy hasn’t said too much about what she is thinking. Her dropped defenses, real tears and willingness to “cuddle” the other day told me the DVD hit home. It was as if she knew that I knew and further pretenses at that moment seemed pointless. That is not to say those walls won’t erect again immediately, and probably have already.

I printed off Nancy’s story in an abbreviated version and handed it to Amy today. I asked (per Nancy Ashe’s suggestion) if Amy wanted to see the video again or... more

Laying here, in France, on the beach, I like to day dream. If I was just to dream about what type of family I wanted, I guess I’d add about five more children to the mix. Slowly, one at a time. And, since I am dreaming today, (see my other dreaming post earlier today) I’d also have a lot more money, be ten years younger, and have a larger house - but in the same location.

I don’t want to move. I’ve just ... more