I mentioned in Take Your Time blog that you need to take time and research options when selecting an adoption facilitator. I used David Bentley (formerly named David Dolinsky) as major example.

I was thinking about this and realize I had a little bit more to add.

I had already selected my facilitator by the time I met David.

And I will admit that I was taken in by him. I thought he was one of the good... more

A quick check of the FRUA board again this morning yielded yet another great topic for this blog… the “Adopt-A-Tree” confusion. A mom who just deposited her child in her kindergarten class was not happy to see some bulletin board poster boldly proclaiming how folks could “adopt a tree.” This mom understandably wondered how her child would feel about being compared to a tree.

The responses were mixed, with some parents feeling similar angst and others approaching it more philosophically. I responded by referring folks to Pat Johnston’s... more

I developed this searcher’s check list in hopes that it would help many of your searching. I have added some humor to lighten things up as well. Searching is an emotional roller coaster and of course we need humor sometimes to make things easier. At any rate, this is not an all inclusive checklist but is a good starting point for triad members embarking on a search for those who were separated through adoption.

To Do

____ Take the time to figure out what searching means to you. ____ Obtain a copy of the adoption records law... more

Shawnda asked me recently which haircare books I have found most helpful. I have 3 or 4 different books, I think, but the two bests ones are Kinky Kreations and It's All Good Hair.

'It's All Good Hair' is nice because it even talks about what to do with a baby's hair. There are quite a few different styles, with diagrams, for both girls and boys. The author also includes a good discussion of the... more

You have many choices.... In some ways there are too many choices and not enough protections for the adoptive parent.

The theme of this blog is take the time to do your research. It can save you a world of grief. Don't just read a web site and decide this agency or state-side help or facilitator is for you. Ask the agency/facilitator for references. Ask for references on different email lists. Ask for references... more

For my birthday last year, my friend Julie on the Parenting Special Kids blog bought a subscription to Reader’s Digest for me. I really like it because I am so busy I can only manage time to read in small bytes… or is that bites? At any rate, this morning I read a great article in the September issue called The Funny Factor. The subtitle is “Why smart brains take humor seriously.”

The article states:

Humor, as it turns... more

Two sister's spent most of their lives living together, working together and making a home together. They had decided to not rush themselves into marriage. To take time and make sure they met the right men. Years past and they found themselves in their later 30's and they were still very content living together. But, neither had married.

They both had talked about children and having a family most of their lives. With this desire at hand they decided to ask about adoption.

Once again they took their time and they decided what kind of child they... more

Someone (yeah, I'm talking to you, Mom) has accused me of being too negative on this blog (because of the last post I wrote about John Belushi) so I decided it's time for me to focus on the super great side of life for a change. I am, after all, a glass half-full kind of gal.

First, things are moving along in the accreditation slow-down. European Adoption Coalition, Frank, WorldLinks, Happy Families, International Assistance Group, and Small World Adoption Foundation all have received approval of NGO status and seems like that means reaccreditation is right around the corner.

Here are some nice links... more

We're walking. Son (son!) has taken his first few tentative steps, wobbling between Daughter (who's remarkably pleased with this new game) and My Ambulatory Spouse. It's still not routine, though. Give that a couple days. And then no book or breakable object will ever be safe again. We're tired. There are two new canines coming in at the same time in the young man's mouth. This translates to my beloved child being possessed by The Dental Devil at all hours of the night. During the day, a little clingy, but mostly cheerful. A bit more fond of cool drinks than usual. During the night, drifts peacefully off to sleep, then wakes up. Abruptly. Every couple of... more

One day while working for a friend at her cement store. I noticed a little girl who kept playing around our water fountain.

Her mother was a busy foster mom. She was running and chasing after the younger children, while this little one seemed to be entertaining herself.

After observing her for several minutes. I decided to walk over and say hello to her. I was worried that the chemicals in the fountain were not child safe and I wanted to let the little girl know not to play in the water.

When I approached the fountain much to my surprise.... more