Ok – in yesterday’s post I said I believe school systems size parents up and respond based on what they believe. But actually, I know school systems size parents up and have several negative biases when it comes to parents. How do I know this? Because up until I was involved in our own due process hearing, I worked as a parent rep on a state Dept of Ed compliance team. We went into schools and interviewed special education teachers and personnel. And we were told about the “lack of parental involvement” bias in our training. It... more

65 years ago today, Ukraine wasn't a country. Lvov (Lviv) was part of Poland. In Lvov a Jewish Ghetto was established in late 1941 with 106,000 people. The province of Ruthenia still existed and was part of Czechoslovakia. After 1945 this land became part of "the Ukraine" (the borderland).

The German Army arrived in Kyiv on September 19 1941. And some people thought the Germans were the lesser of 2 evils when compared to Stalin.

It was a confusing time... more

Someone recently mentioned their concerns over traveling home from Ethiopia with new little ones. I've made the trip twice without the benefit of other adults, once with 13 and 1 year olds, and once with a 14 yr old, 3 year old and a 6 month old. It IS a very long flight, made even longer if you happen to live at the western end of the US, but there are things you can do to make the flight more bearable.

TOTING YOUR STUFF

First of all, keep your carry-on luggage as minimal as you dare. The less you need to tote, the easier the airports will be to navigate. When I went, I wore a backpack, to free my hands for the children. Because of tightened... more

In adoption reunion, have you ever found yourself turning to someone in your life and saying "If you loved me you would" or ending an argument with "don't worry about me". If so, are you using guilt as a weapon? Using guilt as a weapon may get you what you want in the short term, but it is a dangerous tactic that will undermine your relationship with your natural mother, child, sibling, spouse or significant other.

Using guilt destroys intimacy by making love conditional. If you manipulate someone with guilt you are telling... more

Our local newspaper ran an article about our adoption a few weeks ago- it was tilted “ A Day in the Life” it was a short 300 word article on our adoption and how we are helping Livi with sign language. They also printed a photo of the three of us. The writer mentioned that by coincidence that our daughter has my husbands eyes, my hair color and my “ peaches & cream complexion”.Upon reading that phrase I unexpectedly burst into tears.

My grandmother who passed away many years ago always told me how lucky I was to have a peaches & cream... more

At points in our life we all experience it. We tend to wonder if we will be good parents. If anyone said that they had no fear about being a parent. They would be very misguided. I think being a parent scares some of us to death.

Children do not come with a "How To...." manual. Not one book on parenting has all the answers. In fact no two children are the same. So yes we have some basic guidelines. Such as Feed them, Diaper them, Bath them and Hold them. But no one tells you how many times this will be repeated and how long it will take before they learn to do things on their own.

No one tells you that when they cry at 2 am you will need to feed them or change... more

No matter which kind of adoption you are looking into, chances are you will need extra funds. Foster-to-adopt is free, and in fact they may give you a stipend in some states, but adding a child to the family always creates a financial hit. Other kinds of adoption - private domestic adoption or international - are often very expensive.

I have written a bit about this in my Russian Adoption blog, but I think it's worth writing about here as well. The money thing comes up over and over on the adoption bulletin boards... more

After all the torture I put myself (and everyone else) through a while back, all the angst, the indecision and bruises that come from riding the horns of a dilemma over Sam and schooling, I did something today without blinking an eye ... I signed Cj up for preschool. Yep. The thought of Sam starting school had me rashy, but sending my 17-month old out into the cold cruel world can happen without a twinge.

What kind of a mother am... more

The more I read and the more I write for www.adoptionblogs.com the better informed I become about the bazillion issues related to adoption.

I have visited and revisited a number of adoption topics over the past several months and each time I come away with an a-ha moment, or a different way of looking at the very same issue. Today...this morning actually, very early in the morning...that topic is respectful adoption language (RAL). I have always been a language sensitive kind of person. Using affirming,... more

I haven’t done one of my “healthy pregnancy posts” in awhile so I thought it was time…

Exercise and pregnancy – you’re probably thinking that those are two words that do not sound like they should go together. But with all the cravings and eating for two, a little exercise is a good thing. Don’t forget; I’m not a doctor, so you probably should check with your doctor before beginning any major exercise regimen.

Exercise during pregnancy will help you to have a healthy pregnancy and increase the chances of you having... more