Something that came across my desk - if you'll be in the New Jersey area, this looks like a good event to attend. More information at the Rutgers website.

The Allen and Joan Bildner Center for the Study of Jewish Life invites you to:

The Holocaust, Genocide, and Human Rights A symposium addressing contemporary issues of genocide and human rights in Rwanda, Armenia and Darfur

Panelists Manus I. Midlarsky, Rutgers University Eric Weitz, University of Minnesota Helen Fein, Institute for the Study of Genocide, John Jay College of Criminal... more

Often times when there is more than one adopted child in a family, there will be different and varying degrees of involvement from each adopted child’s birth family. One child may see his or her birthmother through out the year while another may only receive letters from his or her birthmother every so often. I know that it has to be tough on the child that is receiving less contact.

As birthmoms, I guess we could relate by thinking of it as the same feelings that we may have when our friends who are also birthmoms are having more openness in their adoptions... more

I have three grandchildren, one pictured here, that I’ve raised since they were infants, now they are 6, 9 and 10. Sometimes my other children, so bound up in their own grief, express resentment at this three, much the same way I’ve seen adopted children treat birth children, with extreme jealousy.

When the six year old, Jack, was a baby, I adopted a sibling group of seven children, then aged 3-13. A middle daughter, age 10, in that group particularly resented “the white kids” as she so insensitively described the trio. Their birth mom,... more

This morning, my colleague Theresa of the Adoptive Parenting Blog tackled the vexing issue of the cost of adoptions. Her post covered some of the issues in the United States, and I'd like to add some thoughts about Russia.

The fees, at first can seem daunting, ranging from about $19,000 at latest check to about $30,000. And these costs have been heavily criticized by some Russian politicians, who cite them as evidence that children are being "sold" to foreigners, since adoption in Russia, is free. That's right, if you were a Russian living in Russia your cost, in theory, would be zero. I say... more

Now Anna Mae, who turns 8 later this month, could soon be taken from the only family she has ever known and returned to her biological parents.

Children being returned to their first/birth parents is rare enough that it makes the news when it does occur. This story is no exception. It is of interest to me as well because it happened in the town where I grew up. It is important to note that an adoption had not occurred. The family raising Anna Mae were her foster parents.

Every so often I try to discuss ... more

Jan recently did a series on birth fathers. I'm not doing a series today but, rather, I'm posing a question based off of my personal experience and the things that I see written on blogs and in the forums.

Why are we so adverse to involving expectant fathers in the adoption process?

I'll tell our personal story first which will include my opinions as to why that happened. L, Munchkin's birth father, and I weren't on the best of terms by the time I came... more

Strange news from China: Ghost Brides. So dead bachelors won't be lonely in the hereafter.

Not unlike the Tim Burton animated film with the similar name. Only, because in real life, quite a bit more disturbing.

Yang Dongyan, 35, a farmer from Shaanxi province, said he had bought a young woman for 12,000 yuan (US$1,600, €1,200) and... more

I have found memories of Valentine’s Day celebrations as an elementary school student. We would always make valentine mailboxes to bring in on that special day. Each child would have one on their desks to catch the special delivery of valentines. Sometimes our teacher would announce a “contest” to see who could develop the most creative mailbox.

Building our valentine’s mailbox was a family project. My dad would lend enough of a hand that it seemed we were always destined to win. We made a rocket ship, a barn with a silo and an old fashioned... more

I parented my son for 10 days before I knew that he would really be my forever child. I hoped that he would be, but his birthparents’ parental rights would not terminate until 10 days after they signed the relinquishment papers. While this child was not mine on paper, he was already mine in my heart. I simply could not refuse to love this little baby simply because of legalities.

I threw myself into parenthood, and I loved it. It was an exhausting time, both physically and mentally. It was hard to wake up at 3:00 a.m.... more

Continued from this post...

-Adopting a child IS in some ways a selfish act. If you are adopting because you truly want a child (or another child) then it is something you are at least in part doing for yourself. I have heard lots of people say that if you wanted to “make a big difference in the world” or do a big charitable act, you could take the huge chunk of money you would spend on an adoption and invest it into a country, family, program, etc. and make a difference that would touch many people instead of just one.

-In a perfect world, both the adoptive parents and the child... more