The KAAN newsletter had a link to an article that was published by USATODAY in 2003. A little old, but they only run the census every ten years so the data is the same today. I thought it was interesting that the 2000 census was the first time the government has really studied how adoption has changed the structure of the “traditional” family.

Link: Census

The Census Bureau's first profile of adopted children,... more

Can you be a foster parent and work fulltime? This seems to be a common question of people. The answer would depend on the individual person and how they cope with things. I personally did work fulltime when we started foster care for about a year. It is not easy but it can be done. Yes, you have to juggle things a lot and realize that things can be done maybe not always perfect. There will be days that you may feel totally overwhelmed but it will past as fast as it came. The important thing is that you are committed for the right reasons and becoming a foster parent to you is important. There will be hurdles that you will have to overcome because you are working, taking off work, coming... more

There are an estimated 6,000,000 birthmothers in the United States – biological mothers who have surrendered their children to adoption (Jones, 1993). I am one of the 6,000,000 – together with a multitude of sisters, mothers, grandmothers, great-grandmothers, aunts, nieces, cousins, friends, neighbors, and co-workers. We are educators, students, physicians, office clerks, salespersons, lawyers, accountants, tellers, beauticians – from all walks of life, all income levels, all ages. Although we may be standing side-by-side, we are unseen by each other and unseen... more

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She goes on about seeing my daughter, and that she lives close to my apartment, how she wants to help me with the baby, then steamroll right into my birth mother, and her feelings about my daughter, that she has also being calling the hospital for updates on her, she cannot wait to see her, and on and on. I panic, they seem so obsessed with my daughter. What do they want? I am scared out of my mind at this point and hand the phone to my husband. A few days ago I’m fighting for my life, the life of my daughter and now some strangers were barging into my life. The phone continued ringing and even from other birth family members. I ended up calling my dad and he... more

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In my heart I knew she was meant to be. My husband and I planned on the possibility of me not surviving the birth of my daughter. So, I was faced very day with the emotions of planning my funeral arrangements, how I wanted my daughter raised, who would help my husband raise my daughter, the thought of never seeing my beloved daughter’s face, so many more thoughts and arrangements for me to deal with. The delivery room was filled with doctors, specialist, emergency personal around 15 – 20. Everyone started talking in their medical terms while rushing around the room, bringing at the defibrialtors beside my bed and preparing them. It really sent home at that moment... more

Both need to be prepared and willing for a reunion, contact or a relationship. In the beginning other birth family members can only make things more difficult and overwhelming to the adoptee when they become involved too fast or push themselves into an adoptee’s life. Timing is everything when birth mother and birth family decide to pop into the adoptee’s life. If the adoptee is going through a important event in their life, like marriage, pregnancy, birth of a child, divorce, death of adoptive parent and other life events, it may not the best time to establish contact. An adoptee needs to be in a place that they can emotionally deal with this and time to become comfortable with it.

My... more

A while back, I wrote about Ella’s sleeping issues, or should I say my issues with Ella’s sleeping habits. My soft, cuddly little one had been sleeping in our bed; my husband had high-tailed to the guest bedroom, and I was having a hard time getting any shut eye with the little princess doing gymnastics in her sleep.

Almost two weeks ago, I took the leap and took Ella back to her crib. One could say that she was a tad ticked off; she screamed, clutched on to me, and cried humungous crocodile tears. I sent her father and brother downstairs... more

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With the older child, I always kept a change of linens with a blanket in the closet, so they could have access during the night if they did not want to wake me up. They had to take their wet bedding off and place it into the washer. They learned that the next morning they needed to take a shower. With older children, they do not want the rest of the house to know that is going on, so trying to help them with this will so allow them to learn to trust you.

With my younger ones I always had clean linens with a blanket in their room, so I would not have to wake the rest of the house gathering stuff up. Most of the time, I did not know until the next morning.... more

This seems to be a common problem that foster parents deal with. It can affect any age child. All most every foster child I have had wet the bed at some point. It is not uncommon to even see older foster children facing this problem. I even had a 13 year old that wet the bed when he first came to us. With some of the children it can be an ongoing problem that they struggle with. There are others that it is short term. With these children after they get settled in your home and realize that they are safe, the bedwetting will just fade away. Remember it can easily return for a number of different reasons it could be that they start to remember more of the abuse they have suffered, could... more

In Debra Stewart Peterson’s book, Breastfeeding the Adopted Baby, she discusses anything you could possibly want to know about adoptive breastfeeding. If you follow the link to amazon.com, you can see excerpts from the book. This was my “bible” in learning how to breastfeed an adopted baby.

Breast Pumps

Many women are able to lactate by using a breast pump every... more