Ella can’t get enough of her books. From the time she was around nine months old, she would sit and stare at the pictures and turn the pages herself. Almost all her toys have gone through stages of being ignored, but not her books. Up until about a month ago, Ella was inclined to literally devour her books. The thick pages of many of her (not so) resilient board books have teeth marks and holes. Nothing I did could deter her from this, so I let it go. At least she was still enjoying the books. Now Ella loves to hear stories and several... more

If you’ve been a foster parent you’ve probably had a child leave your home that you didn’t want to leave. Even as an adoptive parent, you sometimes have to make the decision to disrupt a placement when you don’t want to or have had a “legal risk” child who was returned to a birth parent or possibly to a biological family member. No doubt you have grieved the loss of that child.

But… Does the child ever really leave your heart? For me that answer is a resounding NO!

Sammy called me unexpectedly today and asked me a question... more

Being adoptive parents has certainly been a very different journey than my husband and I might have had with biological kids. Aside from the obvious things, children who do not look like us, who have emotional challenges as a result of adoption, and have a history and other relationships that precede our family, one really huge thing for us has been discovering special needs in a child we had assumed was born healthy.

Our middle child appears to be a beautiful, healthy little girl. Being there from the moment she entered the world somehow left us... more

There have been so many gains in the world of adopting from Russia lately--the 12 agencies accredited, the promise of more to come soon--so many gains that loss seems almost unthinkable. But loss is what I have to write about now.

This week, one of the brightest voices in the Russian adoption blog world lost her referral. This wasn't an abstract, paper loss: Suz--you may know her by her blog title, "Russian Adoption Dva"--had been to Russia twice to be with this little girl. She... more

This is a second interview in my series speaking with young mothers who experienced and unplanned/crisis pregnancy. Although the stories are different, each of these young women have some valuable insight because of the situations they experienced, and the decisions they ultimately made.

The second of these ladies is Amy and she is mother to one son who is now seven years old. When Amy found she was pregnant, she was just sixteen years old. The pregnancy was unplanned and when the father found out he became scared and ran. Amy was living... more

Everyone who knows me knows that I am not a big fan of shoes. I will wear them when I have to, but once we get home, I get about three steps into the door before the shoes come off. I love to be barefoot, which is quite the contrast to my husband who wears shoes almost all day long, switching from work shoes to sneakers once he gets home, and leaving them on until bedtime.

After dropping my adopted stepson off at summer school this morning, my little guy and I had some running around to do. After going to a few stores and picking... more

About a year or so ago, my friend MJ, discovered a major loophole in the adoption assistance program. This is a particular question that we asked when we signed Sammy’s adoption assistance contract.

It appears that adoption assistance does not transfer to the legal guardians upon the death of a single adoptive parent, or the death of both adoptive parents if there are two parents.

We asked this question when were getting ready to finalize Sammy’s adoption as we knew we would need to update our wills and name guardians for... more

Today I was directed to an awesome essay on transracial adoption, written by an amazing eighth grader, who was adopted from Korea by a white family.

The essay can be found on the blog, the Transracial Korean Adoptee Nexus, and the direct link is here.

It is highly impressive that this essay was written by an eighth grade girl. It is well thought out, well researched, well expressed and well written. She also does a great job of being objective, and giving thought and credit to many different points of view. She did a better job on this than most adults would.

For transracial adoptive... more

Today I have finally hit the dreaded letter "Z" in my Transracial Adoption ABCs. I have known it was coming since my very first post in this series, way back at the letter "A".

I have wondered what I would write about for the letter "Z", and how I could "close" this series, which has taken quite a bit of time and work. Many of you have made suggestions, which I have appreciated.

I considered making "Z" for "zoo", and talking about fun things to do with your family in the summer, and how important it is to spend fun time with your kids.

I thought about making "Z" for "zig zag" as someone suggested,... more

Our open adoption has opened the door to let me see and possess quite a few funny pictures of one Miss Munchkin. You see, in closed adoptions, mothers were left wondering if their child participated in anything that they had done as a child, what they were like personality wise and if they ever made funny faces (among a host of other wonders). While I have wonders and fears of my own, I am privvy to a lot of things that other mothers weren't or aren't and, quite frankly, I feel lucky.

Yes, the Munchkin is in dance, much like I... more