What areas of childrearing are non-negotiable to you? Most of us have some areas of childrearing that we feel very strongly about, and you will be asked to identify those areas during the home study process. This is important information to know, especially when matching you with an expecting mother who might have equally strong feelings about these topics. This information could also be important for placements from foster care.

There are many areas of parenting that you might... more

In my last post, Abused Adopted Child: Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), I explained what DID is. In this post, I will explain more about alter parts, which are the parts that were previously viewed as "other people" sharing a body of a person with what used to be known as multiple personality disorder. If your adopted child has alter parts, this post will help you to understand them better and be less frightened by them.

An abused child creates... more

Just last week, I wrote about the virtual impossibility of adopting internationally from South Africa in the context of one family who has been relentlessly pursuing the process for a little girl, now two-years-old, abandoned at birth and left head-first in a bucket under a tree.

Linking to the US State Department's intercountry adoption page that details... more

As an expectant mother considering adoption, you may be seeing some different terminology used as you are researching. Today, we’ll explore the differences in some of those.

Birthmother/Placing Mother You may be reading letters addressed “dear birthmother,” looking at areas on agency websites that say “for birthmothers,” and hear the word birthmother used in regards to you. It might all be a little confusing.

Are you a birthmother? No, not yet! And you may not become one at all if you do not follow through with an adoption plan.

Technically,... more

When my husband and I decided to adopt, after a seven year battle with infertility, we had a lot of emotional vulnerability, but an intense desire to still become parents. Adoption was offered up to us as a solution to the many feelings we were experiencing. Adoption was also promoted to us as providing an option, for a mother who might find herself unprepared to parent her child. Not a lot was ever said, about the conflicting feelings that could be experienced by the birthmother of any child we might adopt. We did not know that those feelings would change and morph, and... more

While much of what determines how fast (or not) your homestudy will be completed lies in the hand of your social worker, the tips that I offered definitely do help speed the process along. I am thrilled to say that our homestudy is DONE. It has been written, typed, proof-read, corrected and sent from our homestudy agency to our placement agency, and our awesome placement agency, AAI,... more

You have adopted a sibling group and just doubled the size of your family over night. The children you have just adopted range in age from toddler to teenager. Each child has special issues that are being addressed through therapy, school, and family time. Your schedule has changed from having periodic free time to frantic dashing from one appointment to another.

Your friends begin to slip away, one by one, because you no longer have time for them. Your new network includes doctors, therapist, and support group members. You trade in your cute little sports car for a fifteen-passenger... more

Encopresis in children prior to four years of age may be a potty training or developmental issue and typically is not considered a behavior problem. The problem is when the bowel movement is placed somewhere other than into the toilet by the older child at regular intervals, at least once a month. The passage of the stool may be voluntary, involuntary, formed, semi-formed, or liquid.

First, a parent should rule out medical, mental, or developmental issues for the encopresis by scheduling a complete physical and or psychological exam. If the child is found competent then... more

Things have started to progress right along with the adoption of our baby girl. This has been going on for a year now. We were starting to think there was no end in sight. Started to think CPS just enjoyed watching us jump through the loops while they did nothing. We had hoped last year to adopt on National Adoption Day but CPS had not even started the paperwork for the adoption.

Here lately, we have been waist deep in court hearings, paperwork, updating our home study, medical documents, and trying to find out why things had stalled. The judge finally stated, “Get this child... more

Here are some news highlights from Ethiopia this week. I've included a summary of each piece. You can click on the title of each story to go read the full story. As always, links are only good for a few weeks, unless you subscribe to the news service.

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Improved Relationship with Corporate Giant Starbucks

A report from Washington D.C. states that an agreement has been reached between Ethiopian coffee growers and Starbucks. Ethiopian coffee growers have already seen their export price rise from $1.30 a pound to... more