We had a permanency plan review for Sammy today. The meeting wasn’t a big deal as we have had several of these because he is in out of home placement.

Neither the social worker or I could remember if Sammy had attended one of these in person before, but I know he has attended by phone. He is allowed to ask questions and state objections to his placement. He asked if the review panel had to do what he wanted, and we said that they had to do what was in his best interest.

Sammy... more

Wow, the weeks are just flying by anymore. It's Thursday again. Time for another list of thirteen things that apply to adoption as I know it. Last week I wrote a list of thirteen things I want for my relinquished daughter. However, like any parent, there are things that I don't want for my daughter, too! Read through these and see how your wishes for things your child to avoid differ from my own. If at all.

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I’m following an online conversation among adoptive parents. It all started with the announcement that one mom has an acquaintance who is looking to “rehome” their newly adopted child. There has been a flood of opinion about adoptive parents who would decide that they can’t/won’t parent a child, presumably because of his/her challenges.

There are parents who are totally appalled that these parents would “give up” on the child so quickly. There are others who hop into the fray announcing that they themselves have either dissolved an adoption or given it... more

Meet Hannah. The picture in this online article is small, but Hannah’s face is blazoned on the top fold of the front page of the Atlanta Journal Constitution today with the headline “How Hannah Made History”. Hannah’s case is being dubbed the first autism-vaccine link case. What will happen next is anyone’s guess. I first blogged on the Federal court’s decision to pay Hannah’s parents out of the federal vaccine injury fund last week, having no idea that... more

In my two previous blogs, I discussed the apparent uselessness of discipline in correcting behavior when the child has fetal alcohol effect. I drew this conclusion after 25 years of parenting, with 14 of those years parenting special needs children through the foster care system. The children with fetal alcohol effect who received consistent discipline over the years as well as moral training grew into resentful, bitter adults without modified behavior. Based on this evidence I now believe that it is preferable to raise these children in a happy, loving home and let life offer... more

I am excited to announce that the tentative schedule for the Attachment & Trauma Network Conference is up on the website. It’s going to be a fantastic conference!

If you’ve never attended a conference full of foster and adoptive parents, you are in for a real treat. It is amazing to be in a room full of people who are dealing with the same joys and struggles as you are. The conversations that take place are like nowhere else you will ever be.

The conference has several wonderful presenters, an incredible... more

Autism may be one of the hottest disability topics for this year’s presidential candidates. All the major candidates have addressed it in some way, which isn’t surprising, given the rapid rise in autism (1 in 150) and all those children with autism have parents and grandparents who are presumably voters.

A site called AutismFACTS has compiled information on the presidential candidates’ stance on autism and the government’s involvement. The information on this website is a bit dated, since most... more

Rape is not an easy subject for me to write about on any level. No woman should ever have to go through the dehumanizing, demoralizing and destructive act of rape. The truth is that some women do. And this article out of Maryland is interesting in many ways.

First off, I was not aware that fathers who conceive children via rape (in Maryland) retain parental rights. You read that right. They can appeal for rights to visitation. They can fight for custody. My stomach... more

Many different groups of people fear birth parent grief for many reasons. The old adage goes that people fear what they don't know. So, I thought I'd shed a little light on why birth parent grief isn't meant to be scary to adoptive parents, adoptees or the general public.

The truth remains that birth parents have parted with a huge piece of themselves. Even the most independent woman will tell you that having a child changes a woman's view of herself. Placing that child is akin to letting go of a piece of yourself.

For just a brief second, put on... more

Young Foster Child as Care Giver - Comprise

I have talked in detail about foster children struggling with being the mother figure or care giver role before coming into care. Older foster children struggling with being the responsible care giver and how to find a... more