Adoption Blogs

One of the books I always give to newly adoptive families is Jamie Lee Curtis' Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born.  It is such a sweet story of a mother telling her child a bedtime story about her birth, and the night the couple got the phone call and then got to trek across the country to greet and gather up the newest member of their family. Another story I recently discovered is John Gregory Dunne's account of when he and his wife, writer Joan Didion, met their daughter Quintana for the first time:  In his book, Quintana and Friends (Simon and Schuster, 1980) he writes, "As she grew older, she never tired of asking us how we happened to… [more]

One year ago our plane touched down at JFK airport in New York and we were finally on our own turf again. After a quick and easy process at the airport, Ella became a United States Citizen and we were unbelievably about to return to our home as a trio. It was a bit of a shock to return home to the states after spending so much time in Viet Nam. In Hanoi we got tons of attention and Ella was constantly admired and cooed at. In New York, no one gave us a second look. We had quickly become used to the Vietnamese hospitality and the stark contrast was startling to our jet lagged, sleep deprived selves. A fairly pleasant man looked at Ella’s passport, checked… [more]

Viet Nam Adoptive Family Interviews : An Introduction How did you choose an agency to work with/what was important to you when making your decision? The Engelbrecht Family - Strong recommendations from past families. Easy to talk to and availability Christina - The agency decision was extremely important to us after what we experienced in Cambodia. We were caught in the “pipeline” when the US INS shut down adoptions from Cambodia and in our fight to bring our daughter home and then the subsequent fight to see ethical adoptions restarted in Cambodia I learned a great deal about agencies and what makes a truly ethical adoption program. As a board member of RathCare we had occasion to ask the US embassy… [more]

I am the hugest chicken when it comes to the dentist. I even get the nitrous to have my teeth cleaned! Leave it to an orthodontist who never should have been working with children, and then you get someone like me, terrified, even at 35! Through the grapevine, when my beloved dentist retired, I had to find another kind and gentle dentist who would be ultrasensitive to my needs. And I found her! The downside, she doesn't offer nitrous at her office. Now I was really in a dilemma. Stay with her and handle my anxiety, or go to someone with less understanding, but more drugs. Well, I have stayed the course with Dr. Mc for a… [more]

So let’s see…what did I forget…. Belane is a copy cat and she is a very girlie girl. When I was getting ready for the day with my one-gal audience, she had to put on moisturizer when I put on moisturizer, she put on lipgloss when I put on lipgloss, she brushes hair when I brush hair, etc. She is darling! She is not overly fond of the crayons, games, dolls or other toys we brought, but she has been sporting the pink sunglasses we brought her almost constantly. She was a little less standoff-ish with Josh today. She does this “one shoulder shrug” which we have been told means “no” and that is what she does to him if he gets too close and she is not in the mood (mostly… [more]

Belane is also now waiting for that wonderful day when Josh and I walk through the doors at AHOPE for the second time and hold her in our arms once again...this time for keeps. Of course at age two and a half, how much she understands about what is going to happen and how much her life is going to change is hard to tell, but she now knows she has a family that loves her. She knows she has a Mom and a Dad. She knows she has brothers and sisters. On August 17, Denise, the most wonderful volunteer for AAI, brought Belane her “welcome bag” from us. Inside of it was a t-shirt from where we live, a bunch of sheets… [more]

This week was a rough one. Hormones and stress don't mix too well in my life and this week was a rough blend of both. My moods are normally pretty uneven, but on weeks like this they give new meaning to peaks and valleys. Anything that seems like it might work, is worth trying for the sake of my soul and the sake of my little family. Tuesday morning already started out crazy, then a tiny little phone conversation threw me over the edge. Nothing bad, nothing really at all, just an interaction that I overreacted to, which is not at all uncommon for me in hormonal times like these. In the magazine that I was reading, there was a blurb about How to Break Out… [more]

Lots of people ask Josh and I how our extended family members feel about our family. I know a lot of people have family members who are not always supportive of their adoptions (although I know lots of people who have very supportive extended families too). Well, today I am going to talk about my Dad and my Auntie, just to show you how supportive they are. My Dad is a single father, and he is really amazing. My Auntie has pretty much taken over the role of “Mom” in my life, and she is the Aileen we are naming Belane Anna Aileen after. When we told them that we were adopting another child and that she was HIV+, they were outrageously supportive. I am sure they have their concerns, but… [more]